Goosebumps

Grade: C

It’s a funny thing. In films, I can “buy” most any supernatural occurrences. It’s the credibility problems that are closer to reality that I have trouble swallowing. The Goosebumps movie exists in a world where characters of all ages have unsupervised free reign over an amusement park that was abandoned years ago, not to mention never even completed, and yet the electricity is in perfect working order, and the ferris wheel is as stable as can be – perfect for teenagers to sneak out of the house at night and climb up to the highest gondola. And ankle-high garden gnomes are somehow a threat to people the size of Jack Black. [He’s playing father figures now. Doesn’t that depress you a little bit? Hashtag “we are getting old.”] Goosebumps plays like a feature-length version of an episode of the series, and I’d probably go easier on it if it wasn’t on the big screen. Production values leave much to be desired; I’ve seen screen-savers that were visually more compelling than the end credits. I am obviously not its target audience, so my review will be about as valuable as I found the movie to be. Grade: C